Today’s guest post is from Glenn. Some of you may have seen this before. I wish I could claim authorship, but no – it belongs to the impressive work of Anonymous. I came across this a few years ago when I was collecting material for my dissertation on Mormon Humor (which I never finished, by the way). It’s not uniquely “Mormon” in its message or application, but I love the way it critiques the traditional “Footprints In The Sand” poem, which has always left me with that uncomfortable feeling that I should have a little more sand between my toes.
This version of the poem is essentially what you would find if you googled “Buttprints in the Sand” but I did change a few of the lines to make it say a little more what I wanted it to say ( I don’t think that Anonymous will mind). And I have it on good authority that Hawkgrrrl will fork out a crisp $5 bill to the first person who uses this in sacrament meeting (but you are going to have to provide proof). Enjoy!
Butt-prints In The Sand
One night I had a wondrous dream.
One set of footprints there was seen.
The footprints of my precious Lord,
But mine were not along the shore.
And then the strangest print appeared.
I asked the Lord,” What have we here?”
This print is large and round and neat.
“But Lord, it’s much too big for feet.”
“My child,” He said in somber tones,
“For miles I carried you alone.
I challenged you to walk in faith,
But you refused and gained no strength.”
“You laid quite still. You would not grow,
This walk is not for me, you know.
So I got tired. I got fed up.
And there I dropped you on your butt.”
“Because in life, there comes a time,
When one must walk, and one must climb,
and one must rise and take a stand;
Or leave his butt-prints in the sand.”