We all recognize that there is a significant distance between the “real” world we live in and the “ideal” one we’d love to see instantiated. Parker Palmer calls this space between real and ideal the “tragic gap.” He uses “tragic” to denote the inevitability of this distance and to acknowledge that even the greatest person living the best kind of life will never live to see her or his ideals fully realized. “Tragic” implies those things that are inescapable conditions of life. In Mormon theology, even God lives in the tragic gap. God can call and urge and try to persuade each person and entity toward its richest life, but always that pesky thing called “agency” will thwart full realization. Given these facts of existence, however, how does God maintain focus and energy and a life of continual striving to try to bring about joy for all? And, closer to home, how can we? How can we hold the tension? How can we resist cynicism and giving into despair when things don’t unfold as we have hoped or in ways we’ve worked so hard for? How can we find renewal of our spirits?
This episode—Part 3 in the series reacting to the changes in LDS policy regarding LGBT women and men and their children—is an encore presentation (with new introduction and afterword) of an extended reflection on these and related issues by Mormon Matters host Dan Wotherspoon. Using a talk he gave in November 2014 at the Sunstone Northwest Symposium as a guide, he seeks to draw attention to deeper and richer forms of inclusion and belonging, culminating in our coming to peace and joy as people who are willing to courageously (but also not without its joys) live, breathe, and serve in this tragic gap. It is a life that offers no easy road, but it is a type of life and independence of spirit in which we might fully be at peace with ourselves and find renewal of our energies. And one in which we’ll find that we are also in great company!
Comments 5
Dan, thank you for this podcast and thank you for citing Parker Palmer.
For many years I held the very traditional LDS “party line” views and opinions on homosexuality. I was very “Boyd Packerish” in my thinking and I had no compassion or empathy at all for my LGBT brothers and sisters.
There were a number of experiences that caused me to do a complete turn around and become an ally who fully supports complete LGBT rights. However, one of the main “eye opening”/”turning point” experiences was when a good friend introduced me to the works of Parker Palmer and I read his wonderful book “A Hidden Wholeness”. In it he recounts the story of Stuart Matis’s suicide at his LDS Stake center. I had heard Matis’s story before, but this time it really hit me. Much like Joseph Smith’s experience with James, I read it again and again and never did any passage of a book come with more power to a heart than that did at that time to mine. It was a real life changing moment. I keep a copy of the book in my desk to this day.
Thank you sir for these wonderful podcasts.
I knew Stuart and his family from our Ward here in the SF Bay area, and still have the program from the service that celebrated his life. Soon after the family moved to Utah.
Thank you for this.
Nice —–??—-talk?—Dan. You are a very good person. I’m not sure where I am in the gaper, border liner member of the Church. I’ll have to listen to that again. I live in Minnesota surrounded by corn fields and yet have nothing to do with them. I’ve been in the Church since 1958 when my parents joined when I was eight years old. Somehow, throughout the years, I started getting very interested in doctrine, not Church doctrine, but what our Sunday School class is called, Gospel Doctrine. I would have to say that I believe all the church doctrine and I use the Churchs’ holy scriptures to find the gospel doctrine. I suppose what would get me into trouble would be interpretation in the scriptures, by me, as apposed to, by them. The big problem starts when what I am saying also can appose what the leaders are saying and preaching. The members don’t pray to the general authorities but they, most definitely, worship them. Everything the general authorities say is true ——-and that’s what I say——–very much—–most of the time and yet it seems, like sometimes we can get into stuff that’s outside of this ‘very much’ stuff. I remember somebody once telling me that if I lived in Utah I would get into trouble because of that. I have often wondered if I should move to Utah.
The LBGT stuff is another thing that bothers me. The leaders don’t bother me. It’s the members. They should read the Old Testament. Jesus Christ was in charge. Look what the eunuchs went through. I suppose if they had children before they were forced into that they wouldn’t be able to have the priesthood for ten generations. There are places where God would curse the wicked up to four generations. How many innocent people died in the flood during Noah’s time? How many babies died when Israel took the land God gave to them.
What has happened here is that extremely ignorant people have done is taken God by the arms and shaken Him and said, ‘Shame on you. Why did you do this awful thing. You are a worthless God.’ They aren’t angry at the Church or the leaders. They are angry at Jesus. It is time that the membership needs to grow up. Do they know that the Father and the Son appeared to Joseph Smith or don’t they know that? If they don’t than they should find out or they should leave and find something else. Sometimes I think the bloggernacle is complaining town, where the complainers go to complain their lives away. And it’s down in complainers town where complainers want to stay.
Read the scriptures and get to know your God. He has seen things we haven’t. He knows things we don’t. The problems involved here is that we don’t know how terrible some things are and have been. And what do we do? We blame the leaders. Is God talking to the leaders or isn’t He? If He isn’t talking to them than that will be His problem, not ours. If He is talking to them that will still be God’s problem, not ours. In any of those cases nothing He does is wrong. The only thing that matters is that this Church is the Church that belongs to the Savior. If it doesn’t, go find something else.
That was beautiful and lifted my spirit at this difficult time, thank you Dan.